Are you an effective networker?

When did you last add someone interesting to your professional network?  How many people viewed your Linked-In profile in the past 7 days? Call yourself a networker?

I remember the exact moment when I became a networking convert. I was at a climate change event. I looked across the room and saw a tall blond with an empty wine glass. We exchanged banter and then business cards. I discovered she worked in cultural diplomacy and that she was looking for projects to fund. I converted to networking there and then.

What’s in it for me?

Better networks lead to greater productivity. People who are good at networking encourage innovation and creativity by connecting people who need to speak to each other. Maintaining a good network has helped me to find innovative ways of achieving organisational goals and targets while making economies of time and resources. Without a good network, how could LEAD afford to host events in central London venues?

It’s not all about you: listen empathetically

People like to talk and the best way to get their attention is to listen. First off, people don’t want to know how interesting you are or how wonderful your organisation is. Take a lesson from Stephen Covey and ‘listen empathetically’. Give them a large dose of unconditional positive regard (Carl Rogers). Once they have told you how wonderful you are, you may reciprocate with a brief account of who you are and what you do. Reciprocation, as Robert B Cialdini has taught us, is a ‘weapon of influence’.

At a business workshop recently I sat next to a woman who said nothing. I didn’t know I needed to speak to her until I asked her what she did (she works in sustainability for a very large corporate organisation). If only those illegible name badges we have to wear at conferences could hold data about what we need and what we have to offer. When we stood near someone with overlapping knowledge and expertise the badge could flash with the message “We need to talk”. Actually these badges have already been invented.

‘To Network’ is a verb

Of course entering a room full of strangers can be challenging. Walking into a room of grey haired men in suits still makes me nervous (even though I am a grey haired man in a suit). Between the moment you enter the room and find a drink, you have a few seconds to choose who to speak to before someone chooses you. I use a combination of observation and intuition before I approach people. Unexpected ice-breaker remarks can help to start a conversation: “I thought I’d speak to the only people not wearing suits” worked for me recently. You need to make your own luck.

Disinterested Networking: what goes around comes around

One of my best contacts often says “I can do this for you”. What I notice is that he analyses my needs like a friend, and tells me what he can do to help me unconditionally. I try to copy him: for example, I introduced a LEAD Fellow to an animal welfare charity for whom I have worked in the past. The welfare charity offered the LEAD Fellow a fully funded place on a training programme. In doing so they facilitated a number of positive outcomes: the LEAD Fellow acquired animal welfare skills, the charity acquired a supporter in Eastern Europe and I am now more likely to recommend the welfare charity to others. My reputation as a connector of people was also enhanced. Be generous!

Ten tips for Networking

From these experiences I have learned:

1. Step out of your comfort zone. Resist the temptation to talk to the people you know.
2. Notice who is in the room and be curious. Never make assumptions about the person standing or sitting next to you.
3. Look as though you are having the most interesting conversation of your life. It’s OK to flirt provided you know where to stop!
4. Don’t monetise your relationships. Helping other people makes us feel good about ourselves.
5. Be yourself. Be playful. Enthusiasm, openness, humour and generosity attract.
6. Don’t expect to meet your ideal collaborator at your first networking event. Perseverance pays off.
7. Knowledge is power. Bring with you the knowledge equivalent of a bottle of wine or a plate of food to share.
8. Follow up new contacts with an e-mail. 48 hours is the maximum time you can wait to send a message saying how much you enjoyed meeting someone. Even if you didn’t.
9. Keep your connections warm. Tell people what you are doing, invite them to events, share relevant reports. Social networks like LinkedIn and Facebook make it easy to network with a light touch.
10. Quality not quantity: compulsive or unconscious networkers don’t necessarily build useful or interesting networks.

Now is the season of office parties, talks and events. Get out there, enjoy yourself, and don’t forget your business cards...